Healing a Broken Heart


Have you loved and lost? Healing a broken heart is never easy but it is certainly possible... especially when you view loss in a larger perspective.

The Seasons of Love

In nature, loss is an integral part of creation. The rose blossoms, the bud is lost; the day begins, the night ends; summer dies to give way to winter. Loss sets the stage for re-creation. This is true in human life too.

The hardest thing about healing a broken heart is to move out of denial into acceptance of loss. When you surrender to loss you pave the way for healing.

I love the way Peter A. McWilliams describes the liberation that comes from this process in the following poem about divine healing:

to give you up

God!
what a bell of freedom
that rings within me

no more waiting for
letters
phone calls
post cards
that never come.

no more creative energy
wasted
in letters never mailed.

and, after a while,

no more insomnia.
no more insanity.

some more happiness.
some more life.

all it took was giving you up.

and that took quite a bit.

Wisdom teaches us that it is 'holding on' that holds us back from joy and inner freedom. Still, we often catch ourselves clutching at life as if we could control it - as if we could escape loss.

It's almost impossible to imagine love without attachment, yet Buddhist teacher Joseph Goldstein compares the pain of 'clinging' to mental 'rope burn.' Goldstein says that unless we distinguish attachment from love, we create pain for ourselves and others in the name of love.

When we recognize these patterns of fear and heartache, we can learn to let them go in order to bring more happiness into our lives. It doesn't mean that we won't feel the pain of heartbreak, it just means that we declare ourselves willing to surrender, to let go.

Healing a broken heart is a journey - a difficult one. We move from barely surviving to healing to growing. As Peter McWilliams describes it:

Plans:
next month:
find someone new.

this month:
get over you.

this week:
get you back.

today:
survive.

As we survive each day and remind ourselves of the impermanent nature of life without resisting it, we give ourselves a wonderful gift. It's called freedom.

Related Posts

Feel free to visit the following pages for more healing words on love and loss...

* Healing Love

* Love and Sad Poems

* More Heart-break Poetry


(From Healing a Broken Heart back to Healing Love) (From Healing a Broken Heart back to Healing Love Notes Home Page)

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