I recently read an excellent article in Psychologies Magazine on the four pillars that happy love relationships are built on. Here they are: Nurture, Embrace, Invest, and Celebrate.
Let's take an in-depth look at the pillars of happy love relationships.
Nurturing your love relationship is about finding practical and emotional ways to 'feed' your relationship every day.
Your relationship has to be a priority in your life. You have to WANT to make it work - not only for yourself, but most importantly, for your partner too.
Happy love relationships don't just appear out of no-where. Every day, you have an opportunity to grow your relationship and make it better. Often it only takes small changes in your own behaviour to make your partner feel more accepted and loved. Make it your business to focus on your partner's needs, and do your best to fulfil them. If something matters to them, don't just brush it off. Be interested - and show that you are willing to make an effort.
If it matters to them that you turn up on time, then be on time, even it you find it hard. If a clean and organised environment floats their boat, keep that in mind. If they like to save and you like to spend, find a happy balance. The quickest way to destroy a relationship is not caring about the things your partner finds important.
Nurturing also means that you nurture yourSELF. Don't ignore your own needs, or be so focused on pleasing your partner, that YOU become unhappy in the process. It's all about give and take.
So be prepared to gently and kindly let your partner know what works - and what doesn't work - for you.
Embracing is all about physical contact and sensory intimacy, which is a crucial part of your intimate life.
Once the honeymoon period is behind you, most couples know that you're not going to be intimate every day. But cuddling never has to stop. Physical affection releases bonding hormones, so make sure to touch your partner as often as you can.
In happy love relationships, couples curl up next to each other on the sofa, hold hands, kiss often, and spoon at night time. Think of your relationship as a living thing that has to be nurtured and nourished every single day. NEVER underestimate the power of touch.
Life can get pretty hectic between jobs, kids, housework, and just the general stresses of everyday life. Create habits and rituals to keep the spirit of romance alive. That's why it's so important to consciously invest time and energy into your relationship by going on regular dates. It could be as simple as dinner and a movie, or with a bit more planning, a picnic in the park or on the beach.
Make sure that you choose activities that you both enjoy, and steer conversation away from topics like bills and obligations. Date nights are the absolute best times to check in about how your partner has been traveling, talk about mutual interests, or experience something completely new and exciting.
Remember, in happy love relationships it's not just about the actual time you spend together, but also about the build-up and anticipation before you go out, and the creation of shared memories that you can enjoy as a couple afterwards.
Make sure there's always something to celebrate in your relationship. It's such a lovely way to mark the passage of time. Whether you celebrate anniversaries with a special meal out or finding other ways to mark what you've been through as a couple, celebrations provide security and validation that you've reached milestones together.
Don't just celebrate the good times either... perhaps you can find ways to mark progress you've made, and also the sad times and challenges you've coped with together. Sometimes a private ritual where you sit down with a photo album and look back at the past year can create a beautiful sense of closeness in happy love relationships. While you're acknowledging the past, you're also creating intent for a bright future together.
Awaken to Love is one of those rare treasures that you want to return to again and again and again. The author shares generously about her own relationship challenges and her work with clients as a relationship therapist, and provides practical teachings and exercises that can be implemented immediately to transcend pain, heal heartbreak and transform an intimate relationship from a place of disconnection and conflict into a haven of love. This sounds like a big promise, but it is fulfilled in the explanation of how relationship is essentially a spiritual journey.
Relationships aren't meant to be 'perfect'. The author explains how relationships challenge you, shape you and help you grow. The book provides excellent guidance on how to love yourself first, release old patterns and manage intense emotions, as well as how to deal with conflict, practice forgiveness, celebrate passion, and actualise the true meaning of love.
A highlight is the author's 'Love Illuminations' that introduce each chapter. For example,
'As challenging as they are, love relationships are part of the moving, breathing, unfolding cycle of life. Just like the seasons, relationships change. If you expect it to be sunny every day, you will be disappointed. If you resist the wind and the rain, you will be frustrated. The very nature of love is dynamic. Nothing can stay alive and vibrant without dying and being reborn occasionally. The challenge is to embrace change because it also holds the gift. Without change there is no growth. Without growth, love dies.'
This book should be required reading for all couples who want to work towards having happy, soulful and fulfilling relationships. ~ Willow Johnson
From Awaken to Love....
"Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up.”
~ Neil Gaiman ~
If you enjoyed my page on happy love relationships, I'd appreciate it if you could share it with your friends!
Amazon Best-selling Author
First Prize Winner:
"most impressive, most marketable title..."
~ Chosen by Hay House Team, including President and CEO Reid Tracy
Mia Rose with Deepak Chopra at the Hay House Writer's Workshop, Melbourne 2013.
"Dr. Mia has created a compelling work that explores loving relationships in a whole new light. She leads the reader to explore the most tender and intimate aspects of loving relationships using her mastery as a professional therapist with a twist - she shares from her heart! The power, warmth and beauty of her personal experience connect with the reader in ways most books on relationships never will!" ~ Mark E. Hundley, Licensed Professional Counselor and Author of Awaken to Good Mourning.
"Mia Rose is a modern day master in the art of LOVE and personal relationships. Her compelling story of her own transformation and the wisdom she shares in Awaken to Love is food for the soul and wisdom for anyone who has ever been in love." ~ Ariaa Jaeger, Spiritual Life Strategist, Philosopher, Author of Ariaaisms ~ Spiritual Food for the Soul, AriaaQuotes and The Book of Ariaa